Honky Tonkitis

Here's where you talk to the band


We're too poor and have too little time on our hands to create a YouTube video for this, so instead, we thought we'd just compile the list here. This is our list of Schlitz Girls Say to Honky Tonk Bands:

Do you play any Kenny Chesney?

You guys should all wear cowboy hats.

Do you play any songs I know?

I should be your singer. I'm a really good singer.

My cousin's band knows ALL Garth Brooks' songs!

The mix sounds...weird.

Can you sing happy birthday to my friend on stage?

If you guys were better looking you'd be really popular.

Can I sing happy birthday to my friend on stage?

Five bucks! You guys aren't worth paying five bucks!

Can you guys turn down?

Do you guys know any Ke$ha?

But I was already here drinking! I shouldn't have to pay!

Have you guys ever done popular music?

You guys should have uniforms.

Why don't any of you guys wear chaps?

That one guy in your band is...weird.

Do you know any good country music? Like the Eagles?

You guys would be totally hot if you were younger.

Do you play any songs we can dance to?

Bands never make me pay to get in!

Kenny Chesney is totally NOT gay! He was married to Renee whats-her-name.

You know who'd really like your guys' music? My grandpa. He's dead.